Several pages from the Covenant School shooter’s journal have been released.  Warning: Some of the facts in this article are disturbing. If you would like to pray Scripture about this topic, check out 7 Prayers to Defeat the Transgender Ideology.

From The Daily Wire. The Covenant School shooter obsessed in her private journal over her desire to be a man, fantasizing about having an “imaginary penis” and lamenting that so-called gender affirming treatments weren’t available to her, according to images of her journal obtained by The Daily Wire.

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The shooter’s handwritten journals, recovered by authorities at the scene of her deadly attack, have been hidden from the public for more than a year now, leaving unresolved questions about her motive to attack the private Christian school in March 2023. Images obtained by The Daily Wire from a source familiar with the Covenant investigation provide perhaps the most thorough illustration of her mental state in the days leading up to the shooting.

The images, first revealed Wednesday by Daily Wire host Matt Walsh, show the shooter was driven in part by anger over her gender identity as she wrote a three-page journal entry called “My Imaginary Penis.” The journal entries from March 11, 2023 — less than three weeks before the transgender-identifying shooter’s horrific attack — reveal both a fixation on her desire to be a man and anger at forces she believed stood in her way, including Christianity and her parents. …

The journal entry reveals disdain for Christianity, and specifically her parents’ alleged attempts to maintain religion in her life.

“It’s total ignorance when parents step in and try to change their child’s environment,” the shooter wrote. “Make them go to youth group and force Christian friends in their life because the old ones were a ‘bad’ influence, I can’t f***ing stand that sh**.” …

Officials have denied that there was evidence suggesting that The Covenant School, a private Christian school that the shooter attended as a child, was targeted because of animus toward religion. The mentions of Christianity, which appear throughout the journal entries, suggest that it certainly may have been a factor.

The remainder of the four pages, however, revolves around the shooter’s fixation on being a man, and suggests a serious case of gender dysphoria. She fantasized about what it would be like to have a penis.

“I want to know what that’s like, but I never will because I was damned to be born this way,” she wrote in the journal. “I swear to f*** I hate it so goddamned much. It’s a f***ing curse.”

The journal entry shows both anger at living through the “torture of being raised a girl,” as well as at her mother and “people in this world” for not accepting that she could change genders. She complains that for much of her life she “actually believed” she “had to deal with it” — until she learned that changing genders was “possible.”

“That didn’t last long after high school ended and no longer had to fear of being called a d**e or a fa**ot,” she writes. “It was only until my early 20s I finally found the answer — that changing one’s gender is possible, and who I really was I finally embraced to show.” …

Much of her anger was directed at her inability to get the treatments such as puberty blockers made available to children today.

“Children who were able to successfully take puberty blockers and never enter a tortured puberty, those little fa**ots don’t know how good they f***ing have it,” the shooter wrote. “I’d kill to have parents who would let their child be happy no matter how different it is to their viewpoints or dont agree or scared of it. They are willing to listen to their children, not the other way around. I’d kill to have those resources.”

She blamed not only her parents, but also their Christianity, the journal reveals.

“F*** parents like them who think of themselves first, and their preference of conservative religion,” the shooter writes in the entry on her imaginary penis. …

Aside from three pages from her writings released last November by conservative commentator Steven Crowder, there has been a blackout of all materials that could provide insight into why she opened fire at the Christian school. …

That blackout appears to be due to a newly reported memo by the FBI, in which the federal intelligence agency warned Nashville police that releasing her writings could result in “false narratives” that “may lead to unintended consequences for the segment of the population more vulnerable or open to conspiracy theories.” …

A Tennessee judge is set to rule in the coming weeks on whether Nashville police must release the shooter’s writings. The Tennessee Star, which has reported on the contents of several of the pages, is the plaintiff in the case, arguing for their full release.

Check out 7 Prayers to Defeat the Transgender Ideology.

(Excerpt from The Daily Wire. Photo Credit: Dclemens1971 – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, Wikimedia Commons)