TRANSGENDER & REGRETTING IT: A TRUE STORY
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TRANSGENDER & REGRETTING IT: A TRUE STORY
This article by Keira Bell is not from a Christian perspective, but we wanted to share it with you because she explains how she was harmed. She tells the story of how she underwent transgender treatment as a child and why. Now she has de-transitioned and is spearheading a movement to challenge the current narrative that is pushing children into disastrous choices. We have included some prayer points at the end.
From the earliest days, my home life was unhappy. My parents—a white Englishwoman and a black American who got together while he was in Britain with the U.S. Air Force—divorced when I was about 5. My mother, who was on welfare, descended into alcoholism and mental illness. Although my father remained in England, he was emotionally distant to me and my younger sister.
I was a classic tomboy, which was one of the healthier parts of my early life in Letchworth, a town of about 30,000 people, an hour outside London. . . .
I never had an issue with my gender; it wasn’t on my mind.
Then puberty hit, and everything changed for the worse. . . .
I thought I was the only one who hated how my hips and breasts were growing. Then my periods started, and they were disabling. . . .
Also, I could no longer pass as “one of the boys,” so lost my community of male friends. But I didn’t feel I really belonged with the girls either. My mother’s alcoholism had gotten so bad that I didn’t want to bring friends home. Eventually, I had no friends to invite. . . .
Don’t miss the IFA Thursday Prayer Call! The Arkansas legislator who authored the SAFE act,
preventing transgender medical treatments for minors will join us.
12:15 pm ET at IFApray.org/live or (712) 775-7430
By the time I was 14, I was severely depressed and had given up: I stopped going to school; I stopped going outside. I just stayed in my room, avoiding my mother, playing video games, getting lost in my favorite music, and surfing the internet.
Something else was happening: I became attracted to girls. I had never had a positive association with the term “lesbian” or the idea that two girls could be in a relationship. This made me wonder if there was something inherently wrong with me. Around this time, out of the blue, my mother asked if I wanted to be a boy, something that hadn’t even crossed my mind. I then found some websites about females transitioning to male. Shortly after, I moved in with my father and his then-partner. She asked me the same question my mother had. I told her that I thought I was a boy and that I wanted to become one. . . .
My thinking was that, if I took hormones, I’d grow taller and wouldn’t look much different from biological men.
I began seeing a psychologist through the National Health Service, or NHS. When I was 15—because I kept insisting that I wanted to be a boy—I was referred to the Gender Identity Development Service, at the Tavistock and Portman clinic in London. There, I was diagnosed with gender dysphoria, which is psychological distress because of a mismatch between your biological sex and your perceived gender identity.
By the time I got to the Tavistock, I was adamant that I needed to transition. It was the kind of brash assertion that’s typical of teenagers. . . .
What was really going on was that I was a girl insecure in my body who had experienced parental abandonment, felt alienated from my peers, suffered from anxiety and depression, and struggled with my sexual orientation.
After a series of superficial conversations with social workers, I was put on puberty blockers at age 16. A year later, I was receiving testosterone shots. When 20, I had a double mastectomy. . . .
Editor’s Note: At this time, the author says she began growing a beard, had a masculine build, and began going by the name of Quincy. . . .
But the further my transition went, the more I realized that I wasn’t a man, and never would be. . . .
As I matured, I recognized that gender dysphoria was a symptom of my overall misery, not its cause.
Five years after beginning my medical transition to becoming male, I began the process of detransitioning. A lot of trans men talk about how you can’t cry with a high dose of testosterone in your body, and this affected me too: I couldn’t release my emotions. One of the first signs that I was becoming Keira again was that—thankfully, at last—I was able to cry. . . .
The consequences of what happened to me have been profound: possible infertility, loss of my breasts and inability to breastfeed, atrophied genitals, a permanently changed voice, facial hair. When I was seen at the Tavistock clinic, I had so many issues that it was comforting to think I really had only one that needed solving: I was a male in a female body. . . .
Last year, I became a claimant against the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust in a judicial-review case, which allows petitioners in Britain to bring action against a public body they deem to have violated its legal duties. Few judicial reviews get anywhere; only a fraction obtain a full hearing. But ours did, with a panel of three High Court judges considering whether youths under treatment at the clinic could meaningfully consent to such medical interventions.
My team argued that the Tavistock had failed to protect young patients who sought its services, and that—instead of careful, individualized treatment—the clinic had conducted what amounted to uncontrolled experiments on us. Last December, we won a unanimous verdict. . . .
In their ruling, the judges repeatedly expressed surprise at what had been going on at the Tavistock, particularly its failure to gather basic data on its patients. They noted the lack of evidence for putting children as young as 10 years old on drugs to block puberty, a treatment that is almost universally followed by cross-sex hormones, which must be taken for life to maintain the transition. They also had concerns about the lack of follow-up data, given “the experimental nature of the treatment and the profound impact that it has.”
Notably, a growing wave of girls has been seeking treatment for gender dysphoria. In 2009-10, 77 children were referred to the Gender Identity Development Service, 52% of whom were boys. That ratio started to reverse a few years later as the overall number of referrals soared. In England in 2018-19, 624 boys were referred and 1,740 girls, or 74% of the total. Over half of referrals were for those aged 14 or under; some were as young as 3 years old. . . .
The ruling does not completely prevent a minor from beginning a medical transition. But the judges recommended that doctors consider getting court permission before starting such treatment for those 16 to 17; they concluded it was “very doubtful” that patients aged 14 and 15 could have sufficient understanding of the consequences of the treatment to give consent; and that it was “highly unlikely” for those aged 13 and under.
In response, the NHS said that the Tavistock had “immediately suspended new referrals for puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones for the under-16s, which in future will only be permitted where a court specifically authorizes it.” The Tavistock appealed the ruling, and the court will hear its appeal in June. . . .
The puberty blockers that I received at 16 were designed to stop my sexual maturation: The idea was that this would give me a “pause” to think about whether I wanted to continue to a further gender transition. This so-called “pause” put me into what felt like menopause, with hot flushes, night sweats, and brain fog. All . . .
By the end of a year of this treatment, when I was presented with the option of moving on to testosterone, I jumped at it—I wanted to feel like a young man, not an old woman. . . .
At first, the testosterone gave me a big boost in confidence. One of the earliest effects was that my voice dropped, which made me feel more commanding.
Over the next couple of years, my voice deepened further, my beard came in, and my fat redistributed. I continued to wear my breast binder every day, especially now that I was completely passing as male, but it was painful and obstructed my breathing. By the time I was 20, I was being treated at the adult clinic. . . .
I also wanted to align my face and my body, so got a referral for a double mastectomy.
My relationship with my parents continued to be difficult. I was no longer speaking to my mother. My father had kicked me out of his apartment shortly after I turned 17, and I went to live in a youth hostel. He and I were still in touch, though he was adamantly opposed to my transition. . . .
I was a legal adult when it took place, and I don’t relieve myself of responsibility. But I had been put on a pathway—puberty blockers to testosterone to surgery—when I was a troubled teen. As a result of the surgery, there’s nerve damage to my chest, and I don’t have sensation the way I used to. If I am able to have children, I will never breastfeed them.
Around the end of that first year post-surgery, something started happening: My brain was maturing. I thought about how I’d gotten where I was, and gave myself questions to contemplate. A big one was: “What makes me a man?” . . .
I remembered my idea as a 14-year-old, that hormones and surgery would turn me into someone who appeared to be a man. Now, I was that person. But I recognized that I was very physically different from men. Living as a trans man helped me acknowledge that I was still a woman.
I also started to see what I was living out was based on stereotypes, that I was trying to assume the narrow identity of “masculine guy.” . . .
Then there was the fact that no one really knew the long-term effects of the treatment. For instance, the puberty blockers and testosterone caused me to have to deal with vaginal atrophy, a thinning and fragility of the vaginal walls that normally occurs after menopause. I started feeling really bad about myself again.
I decided to stop, cold turkey. . . .
After I came to this decision, I found a subreddit for detransitioners. The number of people on it started rising, as if all these young women had come to a collective realization of the medical scandal we had been a part of. It was a place we could talk about our experiences and support each other. . . .
What happened to me is happening across the Western world. Little of my case was a surprise to those paying attention to the Tavistock whistle-blowers who in recent years have spoken out in alarm to the media, sometimes anonymously. Some have left the service because of these concerns. But the transgender issue is now highly political and wrapped up in questions of identity politics. It can be perilous to raise questions or doubts about young people’s medical gender transitions. Some who have done so have been vilified and had their careers threatened.
At the Tavistock, practitioners provide “gender affirmative care”—in practice, this means that when children and teens declare a desire to transition, their assertions are typically accepted as conclusive. . . .
In 2018, the American Academy of Pediatrics released a policy statement on the treatment of young people who identify as transgender and gender diverse that advocated for “gender-affirmative care.”
But former Tavistock practitioners have cited varied problems suffered by the kids who sought help, such as sexual abuse, trauma, parental abandonment, homophobia in the family or at school, depression, anxiety, being on the autism spectrum, having ADHD. . . .
As the High Court found, much of the clinic’s treatment is not even based on solid evidence. At the time our case was accepted, the NHS was asserting that the effects of puberty blockers are “fully reversible.” But recently, the NHS reversed itself, acknowledging “that ‘little is known about the long-term side-effects’ on a teenager’s body or brain.” . . .
Dr. Christopher Gillberg, a professor of child and adolescent psychiatry at Gothenburg University in Sweden and a specialist in autism, was an expert witness for our case. Gillberg said in his court statement that over his 45 years of treating children with autism, it was rare to have patients with gender dysphoria—but their numbers started exploding in 2013, and most were biological girls. . . .
Parents who are reluctant or even alarmed about starting their children on a medical transition may be warned, “Would you rather have a dead daughter or a live son?” (Or vice versa.) I had suicidal thoughts as a teen. . . .
When I told them at the Tavistock about these thoughts, that became another reason to put me on hormones quickly to improve my well-being. But after the court ruling, the Tavistock released an internal study of a group of 44 patients who had started taking puberty blockers at ages 12 to 15. It said that this treatment had failed to improve the mental state of patients, having “no significant effect on their psychological function, thoughts of self-harm, or body image.” Additionally, of those 44 patients, 43 went on to cross-sex hormones. . . .
Before beginning on testosterone, I was asked if I wanted children, or if I wanted to consider freezing my eggs because of the possibility that transition would make me infertile. As a teenager, I couldn’t imagine having kids, and the procedure wouldn’t have been covered by the NHS. I said I was fine if I couldn’t, and I didn’t need to freeze my eggs. But now as a young adult, I see that I didn’t truly understand back then the implications of infertility. . . .
As part of its defense, the Tavistock put forth statements from a few young trans people who are happy with their care. One is S, a 13-year-old trans boy who got puberty blockers from a private provider because the waiting list at the Gender Identity Development Service was so long. S told the court that he had “no idea what me in the future is going to think” about being able to have children and that since he has never been in “a romantic relationship,” the idea of one is not “on my radar at the moment.”
Lots of teenagers, when contemplating future sexual relationships, feel baffled and even disturbed at the thought. . . .
S’s statement demonstrates how difficult it is for minors to give consent for procedures they can’t yet understand. As the judges wrote, “There is no age-appropriate way to explain to many of these children what losing their fertility or full sexual function may mean to them in later years.”
Today, at 24, I’m in my first serious relationship. My partner is very supportive of everything I do, and I am the same for her. She has a large group of female friends who accept me; it’s been very healing. For now, I don’t speak to either of my parents or have a relationship with them.
I still get taken for male sometimes. . . .
What I am angry about is how my body was changed at such a young age. People want to know if I’m going to have reconstructive surgery of my breasts or do other things to make me look more female. But I haven’t fully processed the surgery I had to remove my breasts. . .
When I joined the case, I didn’t realize how big it would become. What has happened since the ruling has been a rollercoaster. . . .
I have also been attacked online. If you’re someone who regrets transitioning and decides to speak out about your experiences, you’re considered a bigot. You may be told that you’re trying to take away trans rights, that children know what’s best for themselves and their bodies, and that you’re ruining kids’ lives. . . .
Although sharing my story has been cathartic, I still struggle, and have yet to receive appropriate therapy. As I go on with my life, I plan to continue to be an activist on behalf of this cause. I want the message of cases like mine to help protect other kids from taking a mistaken path. This year, I helped create the first Detrans Awareness Day, on March 12. . . .
I do not believe in rigid gender expression. People should be comfortable and feel accepted if they explore different ways of presenting themselves. As I said in my statement after the ruling, this means stopping the homophobia, the misogyny, and the bullying of those who are different.
I also call on professionals and clinicians to create better mental health services and models to help those dealing with gender dysphoria. I do not want any other young person who is distressed, confused, and lonely as I was to be driven to conclude transition is the only possible answer.
I was an unhappy girl who needed help. Instead, I was treated like an experiment. . . .
Prayer Points:
- Thank God for the common sense wisdom that Keira Bell is sharing and pray for her salvation.
- Cry out to God for the children who are being brainwashed and manipulated into doubts about gender and sexuality.
- Pray for mental health professionals to wake up to the harm they are causing by refusing to challenge transgenderism.
What do you think about Keira’s heartbreaking story? Share your comments and prayers about this below!
(Excerpt from Persuasion. Article by Keira Bell. Photo Credit: Courtesy of Keira Bell.)
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Comments
God, I pray that Keira would come to know you and of the immeasurable love you have for her. May her story be instrumental in stopping the madness of gender transitioning. May the truth be revealed. I pray that doctors and other professionals who deal with these confused children would offer truth. I pray that there would be a strengthening of the family so that children will grow up with the love and protection and nurture from their parents that you intended for them to have.
Dear Father in Heaven, You know everything about Keira’s life and the demon that took control of her mind at such an early age. Because she did not know how to deal with it and most likely had no one to talk to, she became very confused. We know that You Father, are not the author of confusion. Thank You that Keira is on her way to being healed, but because of the devastating physical changes made to her body, she cannot see herself in a relationship with a man. This experiment on children should be stopped and outlawed completely. How can this be allowed when there are so many who are living proof that God does not make mistakes. To all those presently going through this gender identity crisis, please wait. Accept how God made you, and one day you will be at peace with yourself and God, and He will lead you to knowing the truth.
heartbreaking. I decree by Faith she will find salvation and True acceptance in Christ.
Praise God for Keira Bell’s strength and courage! March 12th of this year was my firstborn baby girl’s 32nd Birthday. She butchered her body just four months after announcing to me she was starting testosterone shots.
Her chest is extremely scarred and she lost her left nipple graft. She had a hysterectomy at the same time.
I had a beautiful daughter with long blond hair and an hourglass figure who now has a four-inch red beard. She loved the Lord and I would find her under the covers with a flashlight reading The King James Version of the Bible. Now she calls herself to be Unitarian Universalist and has a homosexual male partner. I know in my heart one day she would become an amazing woman of God. Keira Bell establishing the DeTrans Awareness Day on my daughter’s 32nd birthday, March 12th of this year, the day she became 1/2 my age (I had her when I was 32) this gives me hope and I believe this is a Sign from God! Please Pray for me and please pray for Tesla!
Lord, we ask you to take what the enemy has meant for evil, in this young woman’s life, and turn it for her good. Touch her heart, her spirit and open the eyes of her understanding, that she might know you, her Redeemer. Restore, Father, what the enemy has stolen! Heal her, Father, spiritually, physically, mentally and emotionally, in Jesus mighty name!!
Father in the name of Jesus and his blood we ask you to continue to speak to this young lady continue to illuminate her mind and draw her to you. No past mistake is too much for you lord wash her clean with your blood and restore what the enemy is trying to kill and destroy in Jesus name🙏
Thank you for sharing. This is the 2nd time I have read the regret of transgender. The first story basically said the same. Children should never have to make such a choice. There is usually another underlying problem just as mentioned. Our children need protection from evil.
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I Amen
Thank you for sharing her story. Lord I ask that you would expose these medical mutilations and atrocities done to those who are confused about their identity. Father, hold them accountable and dry up their finances in Jesus’ name. Father, let these ones searching for their identity find their identity in Jesus. Father, save Keira. Let her be one that testifies of You. Thank You Jesus.
Heavenly Father I pray for Keira and each young person who is struggling with all the complexities of maturity. Help them find their identity in the Lord Jesus Christ. Help them sort out their emotions and separate fact from illusions or misinformation. Give all those who are dealing with the gender confusion issues the wisdom to consider all the facts and not make decisions out of fear of retribution and help them see the harm being caused by refusing to challenge transgenderism. Help everyone stop labeling and just be kind, caring and considerate toward all going through each aspect of gender confusion or even just maturing mentally and physically. In Jesus Name I pray. Amen
As JESUS YESHUA said : wow to those who harm the little ones that it’s better they put a milestone around the neck and jump in the deep ocean: remembering that the kingdom of HEAVEN is like ONE OF them. They’re a gift from God given to us to nurture and keep safe and secure while admonition them in the ways of the LORD.pray that the eyes be open of these children and parents that they see the error of their ways and repent for the sins against one another.
Focus on the Family has an excellent two-part interview with two people who regretted their trans-gender surgeries:
Part One – https://youtu.be/U9YExJ7dWn0
Part Two – https://youtu.be/GNkV9NHp8pA
These interviews are incredibly insightful, encouraging and filled with respect and love for those struggling with sexual confusion.
First of all, I pray for Kiera to know the God who loves her and gave His life for her. I pray for our children, and that the lies to them be thwarted and STOPPED!! Lord, I cry out for a Holy Awakening to YOU in our culture. May salvation come to all of these troubled kids in our culture. We need a new Jesus movement. Father, raise up advocates and attorneys to guide us out of the swamp of lies that calls good evil and evil good, in Jesus Name! Amen.
the enemy of our souls has mutilated,abused and tortured children,many of them already been rejected,abused or abandoned and confused about their identity,and targeted by the enemy to be destroyed. oh Lord we cry out to you for these children who you love. We declare war On the agenda of the enemy,it has been exposed and brought to the light.We pray and declare that these victims who are suffering will be the ones to rise up and be a militant army with the courageous voice of Keira Bell .we pray for her protection and restoration from all that she suffered ,bless her and let her know that she is loved by you and the body of Christ we w her to come into your family with unconditional acceptance.
Expose the Doctors and all those who have,accepted and promoted this radical agenda of destruction of children who are precious in your sight .convict them of their wrong and touch their hearts to bring them to repentance for their involvement. In Jesus precious and Holy name Amen .Luke8:17 and Matt:19 14 amp.p
I pray for the renewing and transformation of Keira’s mind. this will take time and I pray that she will be surrounded with Godly friendships and the spirit of the Living God lead her in truth as she comes into relationship with her Heavenly Father, who loves her as He created her. He is faithful to forgive and to heal what the enemy has destroyed.
Keira,
This is a compelling article that speaks volumes, and truly reveals very profoundly a sampler about humanity shared internal battles. Indeed, outer appearance is never reflective of who we really are inside, only God, the One who created us really knows us. Yes, the battle is on I commend you for your courage and in prayer declare total deliverance from the forces of darkness coming against you. In Jesus’ name!
Thank you for stepping out and sharing your story.
The “kindness” of the wicked is cruelty and nowhere is it more evident in those who insist upon pandering these young people who think they want to change their gender. Precious Lord, I pray now for Keira and those like her that you would touch their hearts and bring them into that REAL relationship with you and the love that ONLY you can give them. Please bring those into their lives who will show them your ways and the way to you Lord Jesus that they may experience real love, contentment as the gender they were born as. Please save them Lord, in Jesus mighty and precious name, amen.
Yours truly considers herself a unique women who likes to do things that are considered “men” activities as well as “woman” stuff. She is SO grateful that this nonsense did not seem to be running as rampant when she was an adolescent as she too, thought she wanted to be a male. Thank GOD that she did not get the “opportunity” to “transition.” At nearly 73 I am quite pleased to be a woman married to a lovely Christian gentleman. God knows what he is doing, hopefully more people will open their hearts and lives to his saving grace for we ARE fearfully and wonderfully made.
I’ll say this carefully but pointedly.
Criminal charges should be brought against the Drs. and they should be put in jail for doing this to a child!
Keira,
You are brave to speak out. Rejection and nonacceptance are huge problems, but do not demand a sex change. These youngsters need to be led in wisdom to become comfortable “in their own skin.”
Changing sex without helping them with account we prance issues seems like compounding the acceptance experience…creating a new acceptance issue to add to the collection of rejections….more pain.
I pray that you may become happy and fully accepted “in the Beloved”.
Thank you for sharing your experience, which may help another young life at the right time.
I couldn’t stop crying for this young woman and all she has been through. The realization of the raging war Satan has plotted against our children is riveting. The solution to all of life is Knowing Jesus, yet we have failed to push back darkness in so many ways. I am believing for The Lord to open blinded eyes, deaf ears, and hard hearts to relieve the suffering of many like Keira. May they find You Lord, and May they be healed from the inside out.
It is shocking to me that children who are not old enough to smoke or drink, who would be treated as juveniles by the court systems because they do not have the mental comprehension of consequences, are allowed (or pushed) to make choices that radically affect their entire lives, rather than make them wait until they are old enough to have a more mature view. This is evil.
What is not stated in this article is that in the British press and particularly the BBC the judges’ significant ruling was not even reported as it doesn’t suit the British press and their ideologies. Most people in the UK have no idea that the judges ruled in the way they did. Please pray that the rulings are not overturned at appeal.
Father we know we are all fearfully and wonderfully made and You knit us perfectly in our mothers’ wombs. I pray for all those bound in gender dysphoria that you free their minds and bring peace to their hearts. We know You love them, so in Your grace and mercy save them. Especially our children, who are still gullible, save them Lord. I pray that You intervene in every unique situation helping them to find their identity in You. Lord Jesus, bring the light of Your love and salvation to them all. We pull down all strongholds in their minds and demolish all thoughts that want to exalt itself against the knowledge of God bringing them all captive to the obedience of Christ. Every spirit tormenting our children into gender identity crisis be bound and thrown to the pit if hell, never to return. Help us Father. Expose every lie that big corporations are touting. Bring forth truth in the mental health professionals that deal with these issues and convict their hearts. Let them all repent. Father, please save our sons and daughters, in Jesus name, Amen.
First! What a brave young man for sharing this story!
How hard this has to be for anyone especially young children with a developing mind!
I pray for his future and his bravery to teach others they are not alone in this confusing time with their identity and how it can be regrettable!
Did you READ this right? She…… Not HE….
Calm down!!! I was going by how ‘she’ looked!! Geeeeez whiz! you sound like a liberal!
I have to kindly disagree with that assertion. To read this article and call Keira he misses the point of what we’re praying for. Emily does not sound like a liberal at all.
Wow, that was not a very Christian loving response. This article was about a women a very important point in the article was she realized she would never be a man. As a long time Intercessor name calling is very out of line. I think you should tell Emily you are sorry. This sight is for all of us to learn and pray in the unity of the Spirit. Elizabeth reread the article and you will see how wrong you were. I pray you realize you were very out of line and you humble yourself and apologize.
Name calling is using foul language like b*ch or f*cker I did NOT use those derogatory words!!
I was simply pointing out how she sounded with her comment towards me! A liberal is NOT a bad name unless you make it be!! Quit making mountains out of molehill!!s
orry for my unpolitically correct term!! ..smh!!
I am NOT a liberal.. I am a grandmother of a BOY who has received the same type of treatment as this to help make him a GIRL. It’s been a difficult journey!!! ONGOING in fact, so I may be more sensitive to the issue. He’s so disorientated he is now prostituting himself and is extremely in need of prayer for his mental condition as well as spiritual. Please put your anger away and say a prayer for him and others like this story as it’s very harmful!
Thanks!!
I had no clue! I’m sorry! I am not angry just annoyed that people take my text out of context! Expressing myself or giving an opinion is NOT being ‘angry or unchristian’!! God is the ONLY one to judge me on that!
I-m sorry again about your Grandson and hope and pray EVERYTHING turns how he wants and you also!!
Father we pray for Keira Bell. Lord that you would heal her broken heart. That during this time in her life, she would be drawn to you and be set free of the burdens she has carried for so long. That she would know true peace, joy, and love in you. In Jesus Name