With the holidays fast approaching, emotions are usually at an all-time high. Some families grieve as they miss the presence of a beloved family member. Some are anxious about preparations as they anticipate visiting family and friends. Sadly, some may spend Thanksgiving alone due to fallout among family. There isn’t one family that doesn’t have members they deem difficult, but I will issue you this challenge. Those “difficult” family members are the ones who likely need the love of Christ the most. What if we could still love past the differences?

Pray for your fellow intercessor.

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Families fight and disagree for a plethora of reasons. Some families may be more divided this season due to post-election disillusion and disappointment. You are not alone if your family dynamic isn’t how you’ve hoped or prayed for. It can be a tense time. I have family members who did not vote the same way I did. Aside from one other member, they all voted liberally. Some are Christians, and some don’t know Christ at all. I don’t know what I am walking into, except that I want to see my family. I can look past how they voted and see people I love dearly—many of whom I want to see born again. 

What Did Jesus Say About It? 

And [Jesus] said to His disciples, Temptations (snares, traps set to entice to sin) are sure to come, but woe to him by or through whom they come (Luke 17:1 AMPC). 

This scripture’s New King James version says, “It’s impossible that offenses will come.” Did you get that? It is impossible to meet a person who hasn’t felt offended in some way. The Amplified version calls it offense a temptation, snare, and trap. This is accurate when you read the Greek definition of offense, skandalizō. It is an offense that causes one to stumble. Historically, it was a snare that would catch animals. Once the trigger was activated, the animal would be trapped. When you put it all together, offense is a bait-and-trap tactic of the enemy. You are triggered by something someone says and does. You take the bait and become offended; this can lead you to stumble in your faith and sadly become a stumbling block to others. It’s a good thing Jesus showed us that we can overcome. 

Pay attention and always be on your guard [looking out for one another]. If your brother sins (misses the mark), solemnly tell him so and reprove him, and if he repents (feels sorry for having sinned), forgive him. And even if he sins against you seven times in a day, and turns to you seven times and says, I repent [I am sorry], you must forgive him (give up resentment and consider the offense as recalled and annulled) (Luke 17:3-4 AMPC). 

If you expect potential for election hostility this Thanksgiving or holiday season, here is how Jesus said to address it. First, guard your heart prayerfully. If you have been offended by a family member, or perhaps you are the offender, make it right. Communicate openly and honestly; believers must forgive if repentance is shown. The hardest part of this statement is forgiving seventy times seven. Most of us may forgive once or twice but are willing to cut people off after that, but not Jesus.

It doesn’t mean 490 is the cut-off point of God’s mercy. It’s an illustration of God’s loving kindness and tender mercies toward us. He doesn’t hold our sins against us or cut us off. He doesn’t give us the manipulative, silent treatment. He keeps no record of our wrongdoing. He is patient and merciful with us. When we realize we’ve messed up and repent, He forgives us freely and restores us. Shouldn’t we do the same (see Luke 7:47 TLB)?

God Doesn’t Do Labels

 Consider this if the elections will be a source of division this season: Jesus did not die to make us Republicans or Democrats. He died to make us sons and daughters (see John 1:12). If your Christian family members voted differently, you can love them anyway, even if you disagree with them. If your lost family members voted differently than you, pray for them and love them anyway. The vote is temporary, and so are the consequences of their vote. The soul and spirit of man are immortal, and there are eternal consequences to living without Jesus Christ. This is the big picture we must always keep sight of. God cares more about the condition of a person’s heart than the votes they cast. He didn’t fall off the throne in disbelief because of who they voted for, nor should we.

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this, all will know that you are My disciples if you have love for one another (John 13:34-35).

How we love one another matters. Whether it’s the lost, our families, or the church, people are watching. Our love is how we will be identified as Christians. We will either be seen as an extension of Christ’s love, or we will be seen as Pharisees who knew the law and “Christianese” but did not honestly know Christ, though He stood right before them. 

It’s time for us to love one another, not just in words but in deeds. We pray for revival and restoration, which are great things. But why should we see revival in the nation if we can’t reach our lost family members because we are offended? I’m like you. I’m praying for revival in this nation. But I’m also praying, “Lord, let revival begin with me and in my family.” How can we see revival when churches refuse to move in unity, treating each other as competitors and not brothers and sisters in Christ? 

You Are Christ’s Ambassador

As believers, we fail to see who we truly are in Christ. When we are born again, we are sons and daughters of the Most High. We are also His representatives on Earth, also translated as ambassadors. 2 Corinthians 5 talks about the ministry of reconciliation we have been given. Still, I love the way the Message Translation says it. 

Because of this decision, we don’t evaluate people by what they have or how they look. We looked at the Messiah that way once and got it all wrong, as you know. We certainly don’t look at him that way anymore. Now we look inside, and what we see is that anyone united with the Messiah gets a fresh start is created new. The old life is gone; a new life emerges! Look at it! All this comes from God, who settled the relationship between us and him and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins. God has given us the task of telling everyone what he is doing. We’re Christ’s representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God’s work of making things right between them. We’re speaking for Christ himself now: Become friends with God; he’s already a friend with you (2 Corinthians 5:16-20 MSG).

Since we are citizens of heaven (see Philippians 3:20), we are called to represent Christ to everyone. God gave us a fresh start in Christ, and we can do the same to others. When getting together with family this holiday season, let them see Christ in you. Even if they don’t reciprocate your kindness or generosity, give them what they need the most, and that’s Jesus. 

If someone has done you wrong, do not repay him with a wrong. Try to do what everyone considers to be good. Do everything possible on your part to live in peace with everybody (Romans 12:17-18 GNT). 

Let’s pray if there’s tension in your family and you’re worried about the holidays. 

Father,

I lift this time with my family to You. I know we don’t always agree, but I love them, and Your love for them is even greater than mine. Heal my heart of any offenses, bitterness, or record of wrong I am holding against my family. I don’t want to waste another minute offended; it hinders my relationship with You. I don’t want anything to come between us, Lord. I don’t want to give you my worship if it’s mingled with bitterness, offense, and unforgiveness. You deserve all of my heart, not a portion. I am making a conscious choice to forgive _____ right now. You know the pain, whether physical or emotional, that the betrayal, mistreatment, and rejection caused me. I release that pain to you. I release the offense and the offender to you. I choose to forgive because You have forgiven me.

Give me a heart of flesh again, tender and sensitive to your will. I pray that you will heal my heart from every negative word spoken over me. Heal me from the words and wounds that no one ever apologized for. I don’t want to give the enemy any room to use that pain to keep me in bondage to offense. Create in me a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me. Restore the joy of your salvation once again.

Father, if I am the offender knowingly or unknowingly, I ask for forgiveness. You have given me the ministry of reconciliation. So, help me use every opportunity to draw people to Jesus. Let it begin in my family. I pray for reconciliation and healing for families who won’t speak to each other anymore because a minor offense ended the fellowship. I pray to see prodigals come home. I sense this is the season you want to see family accounts settled. Bring a revival, and let it begin with my family and me. 

I pray for your church, which was bought at a high price. We are called to live above reproach. Bring healing and reconciliation within the church. Heal the dividing walls in denominations and races. No border can keep the work of the Holy Spirit out. We pray for an eviction of the spirit of religion and cry out for the spirit of revival to be poured out on your church for such a time as this. Let Your church rise in faith, hope, and love. In Jesus’ name, amen. 

How are you praying for your family? Pray for one another in the comments. 

IFA contributing writer Gloria Robles is a passionate intercessor with a prophetic voice for today. For more from Gloria, go to Spotify or Anchor and listen to her podcast. Photo Credit: Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash.